


April, 1936

by buckbeakbabie



Series: Still My Heart Has Wings [1]
Category: Upstairs Downstairs (2011)
Genre: 1930s, Multi, OT3, Polyamory, Pregnancy
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2012-11-26
Updated: 2012-11-26
Packaged: 2017-11-19 13:55:52
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,352
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/573988
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/buckbeakbabie/pseuds/buckbeakbabie
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>
  <i>“Nine years,” he said, not turning to look at her. “We have been married for nine years, Agnes. If something was going to happen, it would have happened by now.</i>
</p><p> </p><p> </p><p>In the aftermath of their wonderful news, something occurs to Hallam and Agnes that makes it necessary to speak to their lover, the Duke of Kent. Established threesome, pregnancy, fabulousness (because it's George and he can't help it).</p>
            </blockquote>





	April, 1936

**Author's Note:**

> It's my headcanon that the George and Hallam have been lovers since they met in the navy, and that soon after Hallam married, Agnes joined them. Because she loves George too, and they both love Hallam more than anything. 
> 
> With that in mind, it's also my headcanon that the Holland babies are George's. Because after years of fertility trouble they all of a sudden have two babies in two years once they move back to London where they're in regular contact with George? Suspicious, I say. And so I wrote this fic about how I think they reacted to that knowledge. 
> 
> I have a lot of feelings about these three, and I'll be pouring them out randomly and not in chronological order whenever the muse strikes me. This is what wanted to be written first, and it's unbeta'd so all mistakes are mine.

Hallam’s hand moved over her side slowly, nuzzling into her neck. He had been doing his best not to hope, but it was almost inevitable. He could feel Agnes’ cautious joy as he held her close. He brushed a kiss against her neck and she sighed happily. 

“Oh, darling,” she murmured. “I can hardly believe it.” 

Hallam’s hand rested on her stomach, and he turned his head so he could look down. Outwardly, it hardly felt any different, but yet everything had changed. Could change. It was all so uncertain. “Neither can I. After all this time.” 

Agnes nodded. “I had given up any hope - I just wish I could be sure…”

Hallam lifted his head so he could kiss across her cheek softly, holding her close. “I meant it about wrapping you in silk and feathers. You - and our child-” He paused for a moment, those words sounding so wonderfully strange to his ears. “Our child,” he repeated, his voice soft, “will have the best of care.” 

Agnes nodded, her arms sliding around his waist, clinging to him in silence for a moment. “It must be the house,” she said, softly. “It appears to be good luck.”

Hallam smiled. “Perhaps it is.” 

“Well, I can’t think of anything else that has changed.” She gave a slight laugh. “It isn’t as if we have been doing anything very different, is it?” 

Hallam chuckled, kissing along her chest as he held her close. His mind was automatically thinking back on the way they had been when they first moved in - unable to keep their hands off each other. _“We’re hardly newlyweds,”_ she had said, but it had felt like they were at first. He remembered thinking that if his mother hadn’t moved herself in he wouldn’t have been in any great hurry to make it back to their bedroom every time. They almost hadn’t, that time when the Duke of Kent called over-

He froze. 

“Hallam?” Agnes asked, her fingers threading through his hair gently. “What is it?” 

He lifted his head. “I - we have been doing something different since we moved home. Something we didn’t get a chance to do very often when we lived abroad.” 

Her brow creased in confusion and then she seemed to think back, as if trying to work out what he meant. He could tell the exact moment it crossed her mind: her eyes widened and she gave a soft gasp, her hand flying to her mouth. “No - you don’t mean…” she trailed off. 

“George. You didn’t… take precautions,” he said, with some difficulty. 

Agnes bit her lip. “No, I don’t suppose we did. But I was so sure that I _couldn’t_ have children, that it wasn’t possible for me.”

Hallam rolled onto his back. “When it is clearly me that has been at issue.” 

She shifted close to him sitting up slightly and running her hand over his chest. “Hallam, don’t say that. We don’t know-“ 

“Nine years,” he said, not turning to look at her. “We have been married for nine years, Agnes. If something was going to happen, it would have happened. And since you clearly can…” 

“But it did happen,” she said, urgently. “In Washington, remember?” 

Hallam paused, hope blooming in his chest. Perhaps … perhaps she was right, perhaps it was possible that this was _their_ child. Even though it had been so long ago. He cast his mind back to that time - five years ago now, or near enough - and tried to think of what had been happening then. And then he swallowed. 

“George visited. He was with us that July, remember? He convinced us to run off to New York for the weekend. And then, in September…” he trailed off. Neither of them needed reminding of what happened next. Agnes was silent, then. 

She swallowed. “I am so sorry,” she said, softly.

He turned his head to look at her. “No, Agnes,” he said. “Don’t - this isn’t your fault.” 

“If your theory is correct, I am carrying another man’s child, Hallam,” she said, her voice choked. “Which does seem like something I should apologise for.” 

“Agnes - it isn’t as if you stole away to some hotel - it is _George_. I have always been aware of your relationship. For heaven’s sake, I was most likely lying beside you at the time!”

Agnes took a deep breath. “But when we first decided to go ahead with this arrangement, it was understood that George and I would be careful.” 

Hallam sighed, staring up at the ceiling for a second before closing his eyes. “That was so very long ago, Agnes. Back when I thought I could give you children.” 

“Hallam, don’t talk like that. You have made me so very happy. With or without children. You must see that.” She was almost pleading with him as she took one of his hands in hers. She raised it to her lips, pressing light kisses to his knuckles. 

He opened his eyes to look at her. “I know how much you have always wanted a family. I just - I wish I could have given you that.” 

“Hallam,” she said softly but insistently. “Hallam, you have given me so much. You must believe me, I never wanted this to happen. Not like this.” 

He reached up to caress her cheek. “Of course not,” he said. “But it has. And - well, I can’t help but wonder if it isn’t actually a very good thing.” 

Her brow creased again. “What on Earth do you mean?” 

It took him a moment before he could speak. All of this was rather a lot to process, but at underneath of all of his confusion and disappointment (and, if he was perfectly honest, his slightly wounded pride) he couldn’t escape the feeling that this baby would be a wonderful blessing. And looking at Agnes now - the cautious hope and joy of earlier entirely evaporated, looking unsure and worried with a hand cradled protectively over her stomach - he knew he couldn’t be the one to take the joy of this away from her. Bad enough that he had not been able to give it to her in the first place. “Just what I said. That maybe this is actually a blessing. You will be such a good mother.”

She tilted her head. “And you would have to raise another man’s child,” she pointed out. 

“No. Not ‘another man.’ Not any other man, at least. This will be the child of my oldest, dearest friend. And I love him as much as I love you, you know that.” 

Agnes’ expression softened. “I love him too,” she agreed. “But - could you really accept that?” 

Hallam nodded. “Yes. I wish I could have been the one to give you a child, but … if that is not to be, then I can welcome this child.” 

Agnes blinked, her eyes watering. “Oh, Hallam. I love you so very much.” She leaned down to press a kiss to his lips, her hand stroking his arm gently. For a moment they lay like this, just gaining comfort from each other. "Are you quite sure?" she asked, hesitantly. 

"Yes," he said. “We will need to tell George." Decisive action would help them both accept this. 

“Do you think he will mind?” she asked, unsure. 

“I couldn’t say,” Hallam said. He took her hand and kissed it. “We will talk to him tomorrow.” 

She nodded, resting her head on his chest. He closed his eyes, but sleep would not come easily to either of them that night. 

******

Hallam phoned George first thing the next morning. He chose to do it from the office, that way he had no choice but to act perfectly normal. If he had placed the call from Eaton Place, he was sure he would have been nervous. 

“Hallam, my dear fellow,” George greeted. His voice was still lacking it’s usual cheerfulness. 

“Your Royal Highness,” he replied. “You sound preoccupied.” 

George sighed. “Oh, just the usual family nonsense. But never mind all that. What can I do for you?” 

Hallam paused for a second, wondering if it was right to burden George any further at the moment. He had quite a lot on his plate with his family troubles. He dismissed that thought quickly - George needed to know. 

“I was hoping you could come over this evening for drinks,” he said. “If you can get away, of course.” 

“Oh, Hallam, old chap. It would be wonderful to get away for an evening.” 

Hallam could hear the faint trace of a smile in George's voice now. “Well, I am happy to provide the opportunity.” 

“Is it in aid of anything in particular?” George asked. 

“No, no,” Hallam said, hopefully not too quickly. “It just feels like it has been some time since we saw each other.” That was true, it had been almost a fortnight. 

“It has been,” George agreed. “You are correct, as always. I look forward to remedying that sad fact very much.” 

“I would invite you and Her Royal Highness to dine with us, but I imagine you have plans,” Hallam said. 

“Yes, we are dining with the Yorks.” George sighed. “God knows I will need a drink afterwards.” 

“Whenever you are free,” Hallam said. "Don't worry about the lateness of the hour.” He didn’t need to imagine what would be under discussion between George and his second oldest brother. From what he knew of the Duke of York, this situation had to be very trying for him. 

“Oh, I quite shamelessly plan to use you as an excuse to slip away as early as possible,” George said. 

Hallam chuckled. “As always, I am glad to be of service. Until tonight, Sir.” 

“I am counting the minutes,” George replied, with a touch of his former playfulness. 

*****

Hallam and Agnes made their way to the landing as son as they heard the doorbell. Agnes was nervous, Hallam could feel it. He laid a hand gently on the small of her back as they paused at the top of the stairs. Below them, Pritchard was making his way to the door.

“You must try not to worry,” he said softly. 

Agnes looked at him. “I just can’t bear the thought of anything going wrong. With any of this.” 

Hallam, unsure how to respond to that, merely leaned in to press a kiss to her forehead. He could hear Pritchard greeting George, but he held Agnes for a few more seconds before he pulled away. 

“Lady Agnes,” George’s voice rang through the hall. “I didn’t expect to find you still up and about. Is it not past your bedtime?” The teasing tone may not have covered his obvious tiredness completely, but it was most definitely welcome. Agnes pulled back from Hallam’s embrace and beamed at George. 

“I wouldn’t dream of missing the chance to see you, Your Royal Highness. Do come up.” 

George smiled up at them as Pritchard took his coat, and headed for the stairs. “Hallam,” he greeted, once he reached the top. 

Hallam took his hand, shaking firmly. “Very glad to see you, Your Royal Highness.”

“I was delighted to receive the invitation.” George flashed them both a smile, but it was impossible not to notice that it didn’t reach his eyes. 

“How are their Royal Highnesses the Duke and Duchess of York? Well, I hope?” Agnes asked, gesturing towards the drawing room door. 

“Oh, well enough,” George replied as they all made their way into the room. “Bertie’s a good fellow, of course, and Elizabeth is always entertaining. But tonight, all talk revolved around _the great matter_.” He sighed as he fell gracefully into a chair. Hallam was struck by his eyes again, they showed his exhaustion as clear as day. 

“Has there been a new development?” Hallam asked. 

George shook his head, impatiently. “Oh, only that David wants to take a cruise with her instead of holidaying at Balmoral.” He sighed, then lifted his chin, looking defiant. “But enough of that. I am absolutely sick to death of speaking about that woman and my foolish brother. I insist we find a more pleasant topic of conversation.” 

“As you wish, Sir,” Agnes said, smiling warmly. “I hope all is well at home.” 

“Oh, yes, wonderful,” he said. He smiled slightly, his eyes softening somewhat. “Very well. Marina sends her love.” He reached out to the side table. “May I?” he asked, even as he opened the box to take a cigarette. He pulled out a lighter and Hallam smiled. 

“Help yourself,” he said, amused. He glanced to Agnes and she nodded, reaching to take a cigarette too. She was still quite nervous, he could tell as he lit her cigarette. He wasn’t quite sure how to bring the subject up, but thankfully the arrival of Pritchard with a tray of food bought them some time. He made them drinks, and George sipped his with a relieved sigh. 

“That hits the spot,” he murmured, leaning his head back. Hallam was distracted for a moment by the play of muscles in his neck. He caught himself staring and took a deep breath. 

“Thank you, Pritchard,” Agnes was saying. “We shan’t need you again.” The butler nodded, leaving the room quietly, closing the door behind him. This wasn’t the first time that George had visited late at night, and by now Pritchard knew to stay out of the way. As, embarrassingly, did his mother. She had retreated to her study directly after dinner. 

George smirked slowly, not lifting his head just yet. “Ah. Alone at last. I really was very happy to get your call, Hallam. It has been far too long.” He sat forward, lifting his glass. “Shall we take these to the bedroom?” 

Agnes glanced up at Hallam. He shook his head. “Not quite yet,” he said. “We have some news.” 

George raised an eyebrow, leaning forward slightly in his chair. “Oh?”

“Yes.” Hallam said. He glanced at Agnes, who nodded at him to continue. “Agnes is expecting.” 

George’s face brightened instantly. “Oh, how marvellous!” he exclaimed. “That is truly wonderful news. Should this not be champagne?” Agnes smiled slightly. “But - I thought …” George started. Agnes and Hallam exchanged a look. 

“We thought so too,” Hallam said. “We had convinced ourselves we couldn’t have children.” 

“Well, thank goodness you were mistaken,” George said warmly. 

Hallam cleared his throat, shifting slightly on the chair. “Actually, we’re not sure we were.” 

George’s brow furrowed. “What do you mean?”

“He means that we still believe that _we_ \- that is, Hallam and I - cannot have children,” Agnes said. She was nervous, and had to pause here for a second. When she spoke again, it was hurried and nervous. “You must understand, I was sure I couldn’t conceive, or I would never have risked it. When I told you we didn’t need to take precautions I truly believed there was no possibility of this happening.”

Hallam stroked Agnes’ back as she spoke, trying to soothe her somewhat. His eyes, however, were fixed on George. His expression had moved quickly from confusion to shock. 

“Do you mean to say you suspect that the child is…” George trailed off. 

“Yours,” Hallam supplied, with a nod of his head. 

“But you can’t be certain, surely?” George asked, looking between them.

“This has only ever happened once before in the entire course of our marriage,” Agnes said evenly, but her anguish would be as clear to George as it was to Hallam. “In Washington, four years ago. Not long after our weekend in New York. It … didn’t last very long.” Her voice cracked, her hand automatically reaching for her stomach. “But now we think that the timing of that is suspicious too.” 

George’s brow furrowed. Hallam knew it was a lot to take in - and this previous pregnancy would be entirely news to George. They hadn’t told anyone about it at first, and then it was too late to share anything but bad news so they had kept it to themselves. 

He took a deep breath, doing his best to push aside thoughts of that time. “So you see, it seems logical to conclude that Agnes and I cannot have children. But that you and Agnes can.” 

George blinked. “My.” There was a pause, where George took a swig of his drink, swirling it his mouth before swallowing. He was clearly deep in thought.

“Would you object to Hallam raising the child as his own?” Agnes asked hesitantly. George glanced up. “It seems the way that would cause least scandal, and … it would make us both so very happy.” 

George quirked an eyebrow at the mention of scandal. “Yes, we have quite enough of that brewing to last us a lifetime,” he said, dryly. He glanced at Hallam. “Is that what you wish?” 

Hallam nodded. “It is. Agnes has always wanted children. And so have I, of course. If this is the way it must be, then I will be glad to accept it. If you will let us.” 

George smiled fondly. “Of course,” he said. “I can think of no one who would make a better father than you. Or mother, Agnes dear. This child is very fortunate.” He paused. “If it is a son…” he trailed off. 

“He will be my heir,” Hallam said instantly. “He will be my son in every way but blood. I can’t give him what you could, of course-” 

George cut him off with a wry laugh. “Oh, I am not sure that being a member of my family is something to wish for at this particular moment. Besides, even of I could claim him and make him legitimate - which is impossible, of course - Edward will inherit my title and properties. Master Holland will be very well looked after, I’m sure.” 

Agnes nodded. “Yes. In every way imaginable. Oh, George, thank you.” She took his hand, giving it a squeeze. He lifted it to his lips, pressing a soft kiss to the back. 

“It was my pleasure, my dear,” he said, a teasing twinkle in his eye. Agnes laughed lightly, and Hallam was glad to see that George seemed to be genuinely happy for them. 

“I will tell Marina, if you don’t mind,” George said. They had been expecting that. George and Marina had an understanding that they would be honest with each other in everything they did. 

“Of course - what is it?” Hallam asked. George seemed to have thought of something - he looked quite stunned. Hallam hoped it wasn’t anything that would cause difficulty.

But George chuckled. “I just realised - it is such a coincidence, though that doesn’t seem to quite cover it.” He shook his head, looking more amused than shocked now. “Marina is expecting our second,” he explained. 

Agnes gasped. “No!” A smile spread across her face. Hallam remembered several other times when an acquaintance of theirs had shared this news. Every time, Agnes would battle to look happy even though he could see the sadness in her eyes. Not anymore. Seeing her delighted joy was worth everything to him.

“Yes,” George was saying. “A Christmas baby, or thereabouts, according to the doctors.” 

Agnes laughed. “But Mr Gascoigne says that it will be early December for us. They will be born in the same month. How extraordinary!” 

George laughed, and Hallam joined him, shaking his head slightly. “Oh, dear. Only you, George.” 

George winked at him, leaning back in his chair as he sipped his drink. For now, at least, he seemed happy. And how could Hallam have any hesitation about an event that not only made his darling Agnes radiant, but seemed to be distracting George from the trouble caused by the King’s behaviour? It seemed to him to have been one of the best things that had happened to all of them in the past year. 

“Now. Shall we retire?” George asked, his eyes bright. “I am aware I made assumptions about the reason for this invitation, but I have to admit I have been looking forward to it all day. And you wouldn’t want to disappoint me, would you?” 

“Never,” Hallam replied, grinning widely.


End file.
